Broken Hearts

I've loved you since the first time I watched the flame of a citronella candle dance in your eyes, 15 or so years ago. I loved you when we were supposed to just be creeping and keeping it quiet. I loved you whenever I was trying to move on with someone else. I have always loved you. The truth is, I was terrified of what I was feeling. I had never been with someone who made me feel safe, secure, and beautiful, and I wasn't sure how to handle it. Like a fool, I ran from it every chance I got, because despite the fact that you treated me like a queen, I was terrified that you would reject me and I would lose you forever. That night that I told you I was going to cut our aimless drive short because I had met someone new and he wanted to see me is a night I will regret for the rest...
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Everything which I created and shaped for both of us, got overshadowed by your fury of abuse and wrath of your malign pity manipulative tactics through, which you have indeed sabotaged and destroyed my life, career, emotions and everything which I loved. How does it feel when you throw someone out of your life like a garbage, even after knowing this very fact that I loved you very much and was planning a great deal of future with you and had many dreams for both of us. I believed and trusted you with all my heart but you have just used my trust and betrayed me for getting what material gains you could grab. You tried to use me like an object and see me as mere commodity and opportunity only to fulfill your needs and comfort but dear, you are just an empty vessel with the hole at the...
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To My Victim Advocate, The day you were assigned to me I was nervous. I was living in a state of fear and unsure about everything. You stood by my side for almost a year until my case was over. During that time we developed a strong connection. I trusted you and felt safe knowing I had someone I could count on when my family wasn't able to be present. After my case was over I relocated and moved on. Later I discovered you developed feelings when you reached out and remained in contact with me. Then I began to view you differently. I looked at you as my hero and forever bodyguard due to a part of my life you were involved in. The day you told me, "come here, we'll figure it out together", was like a wish come true. I fell hard for you. We dated and were crazy about each other, we...
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Hello, your Vets representative is LisaS1 Sometimes technical issues cause a chat to end unexpectedly. If this happens please come back to chat again or call us at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) and press 1. Welcome to Veterans and Military Chat, LisaS1 will be right with you. LisaS1 Welcome to the Veterans and Military Crisis Line Chat service. My name is Lisa, how may I help you? willie I served this country a total of 21 years just to be told my ptsd is not service related and my back issue is not service related when it is clearly in my medical files LisaS1 Thank you for service and sacrifice Willie LisaS1 I can understand how that would be aggravating and infuriating, as well as confusing willie thank you for your support I 'm 100 presents disable unable to work now because my...
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Dear Reader, I just want some peace knowing that the truth is out there. How sometimes no matter how hard you try doesn’t guarantee it’ll matter. And how damaging it is when people that should care about you don’t. My beautiful daughter is disabled with a very rare and dangerous form of epilepsy and I have about the worst stage of CVID along with MS, Graves’ disease, rheumatoid arthritis, asthma, migraines, etc. etc. It’s still hard for me to believe all of it. Infusions of antibodies keep me alive. My husband works his you know what off to bring in money, but One round of my infusions cost as much if not more than a really good used car. I have to do this twice a month. This does not cover any of my other meds or my daughters. Nor does it cover food shelter utilities etc....
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I just want some peace knowing that the truth is out there. How sometimes no matter how hard you try doesn’t guarantee it’ll matter. And how damaging it is when people that should care about you don’t. My beautiful daughter is disabled with a very rare and dangerous form of epilepsy and I have about the worst stage of CVID along with MS, Graves’ disease, rheumatoid arthritis, asthma, migraines, etc. etc. It’s still hard for me to believe all of it. Infusions of antibodies keep me alive. My husband works his you know what off to bring in money, but One round of my infusions cost as much if not more than a really good used car. I have to do this twice a month. This does not cover any of my other meds or my daughters. Nor does it cover food shelter utilities etc. As I’m sure you...
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Life is not easy, we all know that. Life isn't ever supposed to be easy. There are endless quotes about how life would be meaningless if it were perfect, and that strength is built from the hardships. However, everyone is treated differently. Some are born lucky, some are not. Some have to fight for everything their worth just to get through the day. You're no exception to that. I still have so much I have yet to learn about you, so many fights that I'm not even aware you've fought. Maybe there's some I don't even know you're fighting now. All I know is that you've done more fighting than anyone should ever have to do. It's been one thing after another as it all continues to pile up. I've seen it all break you before, and that breaks me. I check on you every chance I get, and ask...
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An open letter to the “father” who was anything but, When I was young, naive, hopeful, I thought you were amazing. I knew you had flaws but I forgave you. I was your pride and joy. Your favorite. Or so I thought. But as I grew, i realized that there was something more important to you. Something that you would choose time and time again. That familiar stool. That familiar cool aluminum in your hand. Night after night you returned to the safety of that chilled glass. Night after night you pushed me further away. I find it especially difficult to recall positive memories of my childhood, ones that aren’t shortly after followed with unimaginable pain. You were supposed to be my father. Supposed to be the man who shows me how I am supposed to be treated by men, what I should/shouldn’t...
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When we met you were everything to me. I fell for you hard and fast. For years we dated on and off. You had made mistakes in the past, shoot we all have. I forgave you after 4 years. We tried again and it seemed like you were a completely different person. Sweet, caring, and compassionate. We had talked about starting a life and family together. I’ll never forget the day we found out we were going to be parents. There was a light in your eyes on that day. However, that light faded very fast when we had lost that little one. You had started to get more aggressive again, more angry. You scared me on multiple occasions. As I was dealing with the loss of our little one you ignored everything around you. You turned to video games, booze, and drugs. You left me to cry and hurt alone. I needed...
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Dear ---, I so wish that I could tell you how much I like you. How I have fallen for you. I also wish I could tell you that I know. You don't really think I am that dumb, I hope?! I wish I could tell you that my heart feels broken today. I have been consumed with pain. After the last, I gave up. I will never trust again. I know you have been hurt too. I wish time wasn't as it is. I wish we could heal together. I wish I knew how you felt, if you have any feelings at all. I guess if I have to ask... I wish I knew if I should walk away or continue. I wish I didn't have to decide. I wish upon a star.
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