I should have known what it meant when, a few weeks after we started dating, you shamelessly lied to me. You pretended to forget we had made a date the day before and coldly informed me that you were going out with friends. No mention of our plans. No apology.
I should have known what it meant when, though you claimed to love me, you were visibly uncomfortable in situations where emotional support was required.
I should have known what it meant when you treated me like a sex doll, with no intimacy or connection and as if you owned my body. Or when you made a frightening comment about rape during sex. Or when you groped me in front of others, including your own mother, like you were showing off your sex slave as proof of your virility. It makes me shudder now just to imagine it. How did...
Broken Hearts
I wanna start this off by saying, NO I’m not over it, I’m not over you nor the feelings I had for you or what I wanted us to be. I ask my self all the time, where did I go wrong with you, what could I have done to make us work ,truth is there’s nothing I could’ve done. Somethings in life are meant to be temporary and to teach us a lesson , but truth is I didn’t want us to be temporary I wanted us forever , but I have to except the fact that’s it’s never going to be mean and you and that’s OK. I can’t sit here and say that I’m over you cause that would be a lie , what I can say is that I’m ready to move on from you. I see now that I put my heart and emotions into you to get Hurt in the end. I had to see for myself that it’s just not going to happen. And as much as I tell my self I’m over...
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I wanna start this off by saying, NO I’m not over it, I’m not over you nor the feelings I had for you or what I wanted us to be. I ask my self all the time, where did I go wrong with you what could , what could I have done to make us work truth is , there’s nothing I could’ve done. Somethings in life are meant to be temporary and to teach us a lesson , but truth is I didn’t want us to be temporary I wanted us forever , but I have to except the face that’s it’s never going to be me and you and that’s OK. I can’t sit here and say that I’m over you cause that would be a lie , what I can say is that I’m ready to move on from you. I see now that I put my heart and emotions all into to get nothing in return. I had to see for myself that it’s just not going to happen. And as much as I tell my...
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To All Concerned:
Twitter: #EndALS | Facebook: #EndALS
I pray that this message finds you and finds you well. I am writing you on behalf of those suffering from motor neurological diseases. Of the gravest concern is amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS).
ALS has been known to science for over 150 years. Tens of thousands of people suffer from this horrible disease and there are an estimated 15 new cases every single day.
ALS can strike at any age, even children as young as 6 years old. It also effects every race and every gender and most critically ALS is 100% fatal often within a few short years of diagnosis. Victims of this disease quickly lose the ability to move, eat, talk and even breathe on their own.
ALS is grossly underfunded in terms of research and support....
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I'll never be able to tell you this so I thought I'd let the world read it instead. I've loved you for 3 years now, since the second I laid eyes on you. I don't know if you know this but I saw you at a concert before we even became friends and I knew it from right then and there.
We became friends 3 years ago, and lets just say, you rocked my world. With you, I never knew where our friendship stood but I never wanted just a friendship with you. I don't know what you ever wanted for me but all I know is, the timing was never right. Honestly, I don't know if we were right for each other at the time.
3 years ago I was immature, unsure, insecure and above all else, scared of how strongly I felt for you. You were strong, beautiful, compassionate, detached at times, cold at times but so warm...
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I felt it as I grew up. I felt I was different. When I would spend my days with my grandmother and grandfather. When you gave up on my Dad and ran with another man. I was angry. I was angry that you gave up on me and my Dad. I was angry that you favored my younger siblings. I knew I was different than them. You made it clear. You favored them. Everything they did was like gold. They walked on water. I knew I was the result of an affair that you had with another woman’s husband. I knew you didn’t want me. But you had me anyway. My grandmother took over from there. She raised me. And for her, I am externally grateful.
I separated myself from you as the years went by. Why? Because you made it apparently clear that another man to run with was more important than your children. As we...
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You’re not supposed to fall in love with your friends. If I had a child, that would be the first piece of advice I would give them when they got to dating age. Make any and every mistake possible: break some hearts and have your heart broken a few times, date someone totally wrong for you and let that seemingly perfect person go, feel bad about all that, learn from it and become a fully rounded person. But never, EVER, fall for one of your friends.
If only it were that simple…
Of course, that isn’t how it works. Falling in love is such a strange, unquantifiable event and it simply isn’t in our control. If it was, I would never have fallen for you. I wouldn’t have had to keep hanging out with you, all the while having to stop myself telling you how I felt. I wouldn’t have let our...
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Letter to the child I never had
I don't think I've ever run as fast in heels as the day when I found out you were inside of me. The first test read positive but the control line hadnt turned blue yet, so that meant the test was faulty right? No. The test wasn't faulty, and neither was the next one I did in my friend's toilet 30 minutes later. I was pregnant.
I didn't know how I felt at first, I kept turning the test over thinking it would say something different. That this was all some big joke somehow. But it wasn't. I could have looked after you better when you were inside me, you really didn't like alcohol and let me know it every morning after I'd been drinking. I'm sorry for that. But drinking let me forget what I knew I would have to do.
Your dad was good for me, he helped...
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That night as I watched you sleep I knew you were going to be okay. I payed down beside you to get some rest for you to wake me up 30 minutes later shaking uncontrollably. As I tried to get you to go to the ER and tried to get you up my thoughts raced thinking I would lose you, but how could God let that happen? I knew as I sat there holding your hand praying to God that you were going to be okay. Until, you weren’t. When I did CPR and felt your pulse come back I thanked God in a split second until the ambulance finally arrived. I still sat there on the couch praying to God begging him to keep you here telling him it wasn’t your time. It couldn’t be. We were supposed to be together forever. Driving to the hospital after the ambulance left I sat there crying out to God praying that he...
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I don’t really know where to start this off. There are so many thoughts in my head and so many things I want to say, it’s impossible for me to find a starting point, which is I guess why I am here. So I’ll start off with the biggest yet simplest thing I can. I am still in love with you. I’ve tried to talk myself out of it, I’ve tried to get over it, but I can’t. When you’ve had something as good as I had, you can’t just get over it. My mind constantly goes to you. And the fact that when we broke up it wasn’t due to anything either of us did, or a lack of feeling, but simply due to the circumstances just cuts deeper. This isn’t me trying to “win you back”, or make you feel bad for what happened. This is simply me needing to say how I feel. Needing to let you know. I know why we broke up. I...
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