Dear Family,
It seems like I can never catch a break. Everything I touch seems to crumble and I'm always trying to fix things but it always seems like everything just gets worse.
Everyone expects so much out of me and they often forget I'm human too. While I understand it's common behavior to point out everyone else's flaws but your own, I just can't seem to get over how people treat me. I have one year left of my "teenage years" and I can honestly say I've wasted what was supposed to be "some of the greatest years of your life," doing nothing of what a typical teenager does. I've never even dated anyone because I've never had the time to and the thought of anyone meeting my family is just unfathomable. Most times, my family can be so judgmental and self-absorbed that I'm...
Family
You are safe at school now. I like walking you there because I get to hear more about what you are thinking and there is space for me to listen.
And I understand more about how you see the world at ten, nine and six. 'Why the hell would you buy a car the same colour as your kid's hair?' It is not exactly insightful stuff. But if these are your biggest worries, I am serving you well.
I won't always be here to do that. We know Mum's doctor says her epilepsy will get her one day. Fruit loops say Karma will. But either way, I wanted to write down a few things for you to remember as you get bigger:
- Never trust a zebra crossing. Just because they are named after a friendly animal, doesn't mean drivers accord them the same respect. The one near your school is lethal. Think Guardian,...
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Subject: Please help my pregnant 31 yr. old
From: EL Afan- ador
Date: 5 Jun 2015
This is for Angelina JoIie-Pitt
Hello, I feel like I am dying. My 31 year old daughter is pregnant, not seen an obstetrician, not eating, panhandling, jumped bail recently on a paraphanelia warrant, sleeps on the floor as a squatter in some FEMA trailer in the middle of nowhere, is surrounded by addicts who share or squat there...
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Dear Linnea,
We love you beyond what words can express. We have cherished you from your first breath and our affection has only increased with each day. We never imagined loving anyone as much as we love you and your brother and sister. No matter what happens, our love for you will not falter. We will never stop loving you passionately. Never.
Our best memories are filled with you. 19 years of absolute enjoyment coming from your compassionate character, your skills and your joy-filled personality. Our thoughts are filled with thousands of beautiful images of you: bakery runs, private piano recitals, the “donut hotel,” singing “concerts” in the dishline at camp, hikes on mountains and through rivers, lazy summer days, Gram’s playhouse, the RV trip, the summer house, playing in the...
3,156
Dear L.Y.,
In a box somewhere in the garage there is footage of the two of us. Although it’s lost in storage, it streams in my memory. I am holding you. You fit neatly in my two hands. My heart fits perfectly around your little finger – small as it was. It is a long time ago. It is the embodiment of that worn out metaphor we reach for to describe fathers and daughters. “Tied around fingers” or something like that. Clearly, I am entwined. I’ve always been. Quietly, I bend down and whisper something to you. It’s hard to make out what I’m saying on this fuzzy old tape. But, I know exactly what I said. I’ve been saying it for fourteen years. You have heard me say it in word and deed every day since. “You will always be this child here in my hands. I will never leave you nor forsake you. I...
3,137
Dear Jim,
First I would like to thank you for airing your dirty laundry on such a public forum as a comment on an open Facebook post. I thought that you and I had had this discussion twice before, and since you decided to make it public knowledge, I have decided to write this letter in a public and open forum for the purposes of helping other men who may be going through the same situation I am going through.
I decided years ago that a relationship between you and I was never going to happen, but, we never really had one did we? You left me when I was two. This wounded me. You have no idea the wounds I still deal with today because of that abandonment. Sure, there would be visits, occasional interactions with a man that I didn’t really know and didn’t really know me. The question...
6,432
Dear Michael,
I know we didn’t plan for this, but life is messy and plans don’t always work out. God knows, what we plan for ourselves is usually far less grand than what He has planned for us. What do we know anyway? Who knew that you’d be at home with our little girl…her constant, her steady, her rock. As a brand-new, first-time, huge-ball-of-nerves mom, I was nervous to leave my sweet, new baby at home with you (and I admit, a little jealous too.) I kept reminding myself, He loves her just as much as I do. He won’t let anything happen to her. I had my doubts about whether you would be able to handle it. I pictured a poor, screaming baby and a frustrated, exhausted Daddy. I imagined every worst-case scenario and every potential disaster, but those things never happened. You...
3,004
Firstly, I congratulate you for not doing as others sometimes do which is to avoid the big "scary looking" dog at all costs. All dogs can look very scary at times, some (unfortunately) just always have that look despite being as soft as can be.
However, please, please please ask before petting a stranger's dog. Rarely do dogs enjoy being patted on the head by strangers and it would only take a split second for your child to be severely hurt if that dog reacted badly. Please teach your child that while she needn't be afraid of dogs, they – like some people – do not always want to be touched, or even noticed. She will be protecting herself from potential harm and that is what's important.
As we approached from the opposite direction, I stood to one side with my dog beside the wall:...
2,797
Dear Daddy
You know I love you. You know I respect your opinion, and you know that I appreciate all you sacrificed to raise me to be the strong, independent woman I am. You also know that we will never agree on certain things. Some examples of those differences of opinion are religion, LGBT rights, and the role of women in the household. Judging from the two heated discussions we have had on the Bill Cosby sexual assault situation, that is another matter we disagree on. While the others are things we have been able to agree to disagree on and never discuss again in the interest of preserving our relationship, this Bill Cosby situation is one I cannot keep my mouth shut on.
Daddy, I know what Bill Cosby means to you. In your eyes,the eyes of a black man who grew up during the...
3,647
Dear Father,
12 years ago you came back home after week away on a business trip with a young lady in tow, whom I presumed to be your secretary. You stormed into the house and, in your terrifying voice, demanded that we pack and leave. Just like that Mom, my sister and I to leave what had known as our home for the last 10 years. Your reason was that Mom had become "too much" hence you needed to "teacher her a lesson". We only left with the clothes on our backs leaving all what you and mom had worked so hard together to amass.
The next few months were very tough on us. We moved into a smaller house, enrolled into an ill-equipped public school and eating out on Sunday afternoons became a luxury we couldn’t afford. When I asked Mom why you didn’t love us anymore all she did was cry. She...
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