Family

Dear Son: I am writing you this letter now so hopefully when you’re an adult you will read this and it will have meaning. I want you to know that you are the most important thing in my life, and seeing you thrive each day makes me a proud dad. See, I realized when I was a teenager that I’m gay (as you well know by now). I didn’t know that I could have you. I always dreamed of having a family, but part of coming to terms with my sexuality meant that I might have to sacrifice that idea. I met your other dad when I was 21 and we discussed having kids within our first few dates. It still seemed surreal and unfathomable. You entered my life when I was 32, and looking back I still can’t believe it only took 11 years to make my dream come true. You are 4½ years old now, and I’m starting to...
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I know that you wouldn't want to hear this from me but it needs to be said. You are in a horrible position. To be put in the middle of your parents and having to choose is a situation that no child should have to be put in. However, i worry that you're choosing the wrong path. You know that your mum and dad don't like each other, that isn't going to be a surprise. But what you need to remember is that you're only hearing your mum's side of the story. Both of them did things that led to them splitting up. No one's fault, just one of those things that grown ups do. I know your dad was devastated to leave you. That's why for the last 5 years he has done everything he can to see you and to be a good dad. He's paid your mum a lot of money every week since he moved out, despite what your mum...
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Dear Parents, We have just concluded our first family meetings of the year with you and your teens. It is energizing for us to meet with you to get an indication from all parties of Compass’s role in the life of your family. We are left with the feeling that we are all part of a team, supporting one young person. Although we may not always know it, we sense that the family meetings are a powerful experience for the teens; their voices matter. We call them “family meetings” versus “parent meetings” very purposefully. We learn useful ways of interacting with your teen as we observe you negotiating and discussing various things with your child. We see how deeply you care. As we negotiate how teens use their time at Compass, we recognize that we are in a very different position than you...
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Dear Dad, Do you remember all the times you hit me? The times I starved? Everyday I wanted you to hug me. But we didn't hug in our house, did we? We didn't tell each other when we were proud, or that we loved each other. Infact we only spoke when I was in trouble. Then, when I got older I was just pushed to one side. I'm sure you never meant to be so cruel, I know Mom hurt you, but why did you take it out on me? As I've grown up I did everything I could to get your approval and couldn't, no matter what I did you were never proud. Today, I've sat in tears again, at 29 years old still desperate for your love. I'm almost certain now ill never get it, you seem to get more bitter and more distant with age, your body is becoming as fragile as you made my soul. I trust that little bit less, I...
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I have so much I want to say to all 3 of you, but can never find the words. I hope as each of you come of age you will get the chance to read this letter. I always tried to be a good Mom, and do everything my parents didn't, I realise now I took it too far. To my eldest, beautiful daughter, I wont name you, you know who you are. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. I'm sorry I leant on you when you should have been leaning on me. I never meant to make you feel like you were the Mom. I always wanted us to have a close relationship, and I realise now I was wrong. I tried too hard to be your friend and forgot to be your Mother. I'm so sorry I put my pain onto you, and I hope you can forgive me. My gorgeous Son, I'm sorry I found your behaviour so hard, I realise now you were only seeking...
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Dear Dad, Its me, your child. The Robert Griffinfant. Im writing this letter to you from the inside of my moms stomach (by the way tell her to knock it off with all the broccoli lol!) I wanted to write you because I love you but frankly Im a little concern that the only child you should be worrying about is the one in the mirror no offense. Youve allready got people who depend on you to let them down there called Redskins fans! Dont get me wrong Dad I think your going to be a great father but the most important thing in your life right now should be making sure that your playing sports good- in other words if I were you I'd be more concerned with finishing inside the red zone on the field- not in the bedroom. And while Im flattered by all the attenton youve shown me on social media...
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Dear Baby Collins, Having just entered life and found myself as your father, you're probably thinking, "Great, who's this schlub?" I know, I know, I'm not all that impressive on first glance, but before you decide to pack your things and leave - which is entirely your right - allow me to make my case. If you are willing to hear it, please proceed. While it is true that you exist as a result of your mother and I engaging in intimate copulation, such should not be the reason you accept me as your father. Sharing DNA should not be the basis for voluntary association. Rather, I advise you to consider the merits of any given association and its effect on your future happiness. Having dismissed the presumption of default association by blood, I will now proceed to explain why I'm your...
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Dear OB/GYN, I’m the father of a two year old boy named Noah who was born with Down syndrome, and whom we love very much. I understand that in the course of your day to day work you often have the difficult responsibility of telling parents news they never thought they would receive; that there’s a good possibility that the little boy or girl in their mothers womb is going to be born with Down syndrome. Why I’m Writing You This Letter My hope in writing you this letter is to tell you some of the things I wish I would have known the day we found out our son was born with Down syndrome. Our son did not have a prenatal diagnosis of Down syndrome, and our amazing pediatrician did a great job of calming our fears, honoring the life of our boy, and letting us know we were in this...
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Dear Dad, I want to let you know first of all that I love you and forgive you for what this has done in my life. I also wanted to let you know exactly what your porn use has done to my life. You may think that this effects only you, or even your and mom’s relationships. But it has had a profound impact on me and all of my siblings as well. I found your porn on the computer somewhere around the age of 12 or so, just when I was starting to become a young woman. First of all, it seemed very hypocritical to me that you were trying to teach me the value of what to let into my mind in terms of movies, yet here you were entertaining your mind with this junk on a regular basis. Your talks to me about being careful with what I watched meant virtually nothing. Because of pornography, I was...
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Dear Pa, I know you care deeply about many issues, especially social justice. You’re tired of wars, you’re ashamed of the attempts to destroy social programs in this country, you hate seeing the unions that helped you as a worker provide for our family get dismantled by wealthy CEOs whose only goal is to make themselves and their cronies more wealthy. These are noble things to believe in, and values that you’ve instilled in your children. But you probably don’t often consider how you select and digest (and frequently, share on Facebook) the stories that you’ll accept as true. This is called cognitive bias–sorry, that’s a terrible article for a layman, but I’d be happy to discuss next time I’m home. Anyway, the bottom line is that the beliefs you already hold prime you to accept...
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