Dear Ellen,
I don't really know where to begin but to simply tell you thank you for being you. You bring out the definition of what everyday people should be: happy, funny, and living life to it fullest. All three of these are probably just a little in site into the kind of person you are. You are definitely one special human being. It has always been a dream of mine to meet you or someday be apart of your show, but let's face it... I'm not musically or artistically talented, a crazy athlete or someone with a huge life story. I guess for now I'll have to deal with the fact that I thought it was the coolest thing to come to Warner Brother's Studio, when I took my trip to California back in May, and be within feet of your studio (and where you park, but shh my tour guide said to keep...
Entertainment
September 9, 1990
Dear Friends,
When I saw your Calendar cover today about George Michael, "the reluctant pop star," my first reaction was he should thank the good Lord every morning when he wakes up to have all that he has., And that'll make two of us thanking God every morning for all that we have.
I don't understand a guy who lives "in hopes of reducing the strain of his celebrity status." Here's a kid who "wanted to be a pop star since I was about 7 years old." And now that he's a smash performer and songwriter at 27 he wants to quit doing what tons of gifted youngsters all over the world would shoot grandma for - just one crack at what he's complaining about.
Come on George, Loosen up. Swing, man, Dust off those gossamer wings and fly yourself to the moon of your choice...
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Dear Elton,
First of all, my apologies for not calling you ‘sir,’ but I’m an American and we don’t really go in for all that nobility stuff over on this side of the pond. Don’t fret, however; we still worship celebrities, which is why every single news site I read breathlessly reported your comments regarding Jesus, the Pope and the Catholic Church this week.
As a Catholic myself, I have to take issue with a few of the things you said in your Sky News interview – namely, that Jesus Christ would support gay “marriage,” that the traditions of the Catholic Church are “old and stupid,” and that Pope Francis has “stripped [the Church] down to the bare bones” – a development you find “wonderful.” But before I jump into all that, let me back up about eight years to 2006.
Back then, in...
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Dear NBC and Jimmy Fallon,
I want to start off by saying I'm a huge fan of Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. Mr. Fallon is funny. Like, truly funny. The show is definitely one of the funniest late night shows out there right now.
When I heard about your gluten free cookbook sketch, I had to check it out for myself. At first, all I could say was ... Wow, that was not funny. It wasn't just because I do have Celiac disease or because I'm oversensitive, either.
Instead, the sketch was actually just not funny. I'm still not exactly sure what the joke therein was supposed to be, but I am sure that alienating one out of every 133 Americans is not a very good idea. Making fun of a gluten free cookbook and then smashing a gluten-containing pie in the face of a supposedly gluten-free person...
6,154
Hey Ed,
I got your email this week about the exciting news you had to share! You’ve signed your first artist, Jaime Lawson, to your record label, Gingerbread Man Records. You have a record label, let that sink in. Not to mention you gave it the absolute best possible name.
With all this excitement, I couldn’t help but reflect on some on major milestones in your career thus far. So I’d like to take some time to remind you of your good doings.
1) Most recently, you sold out Wembley Stadium (which seats 90,000 people)… 3 freakin nights in a row (that’s 270,000 lucky people). I know you wanted to prove to the people in the industry that still don’t take you seriously (bloody idiots they are), that you could. But as a fan always rooting for your success, holy smokes! You’ve worked...
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Goddamnit, we just love to hate the Kardashians. But our reasons for hating on them in the past were simply because of their exceptional life choices – and their whiny high-pitched voices.
This reason is a little more legit than hating on Kimye for making a designer baby – or for probably naming their future kid South West.
Your lawn is looking awfully nice lately. I mean, did you hear that California is experiencing the biggest drought in history???
Apparently, the Kardashian Mob has decided that the water laws don’t apply to them. Why are we not surprised? Helicopters have recently photographed the neighborhood lawns, showing that the Kardashians are clearly overusing mass amounts of water.
All the while, California is experiencing one of the driest years on record, with...
3,463
Regarding my ‘Soundscapes’ experience of Sunday 16th August 2015
Dear Nic,
(Gabriele - I’m not going to lay this at your door, seeing as you’ve only just arrived.)
I would like to extend to you my congratulations. This is the first time in my 33 years that I can say an art exhibition has left me feeling genuinely angry.
The moment that I sat down to watch the utterly patronising 20 minute documentary that ‘explains’ your Soundscapes exhibition, my heart sank. My mood did not improve when I quickly realised that I was probably going to be spat out at the other end well within the subsequent 20 minutes.
I feel a burning need to point out what should have been blindingly obvious to everyone involved in creating this exhibition - that the very premise of Soundscapes was...
1,530
Dearest Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris,
Just a swift note to say: we get it. You’re in a relationship. You’re in love. Congratulations. But it’s getting to be a little… much.
We see you floating around in a swan boat. Very impressive. We see you, Calvin, defending your lady’s honor against the menace that is Zayn Malik. Very chivalrous. We see you, Tay Tay, mouthing those three little words to Calvin on stage. Very cute.
The issue is that we’re reaching our Taylor-Calvin saturation point, and we haven’t even heard any collaborations — nor have we managed to come up with a decent couple name.
You don’t see Beyoncé and Jay Z showing off their power couple status on social media at every turn. You see Photoshopped thigh gaps, sure, but not relationship bragging.
Even though...
3,695
Dear Chris,
I really did not want to write this open letter, and would have preferred to speak to you in person, in private. Indeed, ever since the domestic violence incident with Rihanna two years ago, there have been attempts, by some of the women currently or formerly in your circle -- women who love and care deeply about you -- to bring you and I together, as they felt my own life story, my own life experiences, might be of some help in your journey. For whatever reason, that never happened. By pure coincidence, I wound up in a Harlem recording studio with you about three months ago, as I was meeting up with R...
5,005
A lot of people might not be aware of who 'Ali-A' is but to those interested in computer games and especially Call of Duty, he is one of the go-to guys for interesting YouTube content and gameplay.
Why is this deserving of a letter you might ask? Well with over 6.5 million followers he has more of a presence than the likes of formulaic pop stars that young kids are told to idolise and he is proof of the potential the internet has for young people to make a name for themselves and make money.
I wasn't initially compelled to write a letter about this, not until I overheard a 9-year-old having dinner with his parents in a restaurant in London. The boy said he wanted to start a YouTube channel and that you can make money out of it, at which point his dad snapped "what kind of career is...
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